The Gottman Institute

How is your relationship going?  Is it growing?  Recently I attended further training from the Gottman Institute.  This helps me  to further utilise the Relationship Checkup.  This research-based assessment adds value to relationship counselling.  The Gottman INTAKE process is made up of 4 sessions.   When counselling is done online, other arrangements can be made [...]

By |2021-06-07T05:16:04+00:00June 7th, 2021|Couples reconnecting, Relationship Assessment, Uncategorized|Comments Off on The Gottman Institute

Accept what you cannot change

Today I finished reading a novel by Wallace Stegner, Angle of Repose. No doubt it was a Pulitzer Prize Winner, and I was sorry it ended. Yet the penultimate line was on the last page, “Wisdom….is knowing what you have to accept”.  This reminds me of the Serenity Prayer. The angle of repose that Stegner referred [...]

By |2019-11-12T10:31:52+00:00September 29th, 2018|Couples reconnecting|Comments Off on Accept what you cannot change


Many couples say that their goal is to learn to communicate better. I find that often in the past they have know how to communicate, however there have been some more recent roadblocks that have prevented it. Sometimes the daily routines and roles have gotten in the way of making intentional time to be together [...]

By |2019-11-12T10:39:06+00:00June 10th, 2018|Couples reconnecting|Comments Off on Connections

Life Transition

Midlife crisis or transformation? Some people make grandiose purchases in midlife. Does this mean that they are going through a crisis, or a search for more meaning? Perhaps both? Transitions can be stressful, however change is a constant in life. How we deal with stress will determine how we accept change. Certainly any decadent birthday [...]

By |2019-11-12T10:33:52+00:00February 25th, 2018|Couples reconnecting|Comments Off on Life Transition

Child-Foccused Parenting

When I see couples whose children are indulged with material possessions despite financial stressors on their relationship, I wonder if their children know about the finances? I hope they don’t! However the parents need to monitor their own spending priorities. Reduce Conflict around Children Other times I ask how conflict between partners impacts their children. [...]

By |2019-11-12T10:30:20+00:00August 14th, 2017|Couples reconnecting|Comments Off on Child-Foccused Parenting

Forgiveness is not a dirty word

Many have said in jest, “forgive and forget”.  However we would not want to forget events, otherwise where is the learning? What we do want though is less negative intensity of memories that trigger us. Forgiveness is a living thing, and it’s brought alive by the intention of our will. Life wasn’t meant to be [...]

By |2019-11-12T10:37:57+00:00June 17th, 2015|Couples reconnecting|Comments Off on Forgiveness is not a dirty word

The Maths of ‘good enough’ relationships

Couple relationships can be as different as the individuals who comprise them.  However there are some important ingredients to enable relationships to work well, and others to work well enough.  So what constitutes a ‘good enough’ relationship? In my research and in what clients have taught me, the ‘good enough’ relationship is one in which both [...]

By |2019-11-12T10:32:25+00:00June 17th, 2015|Couples reconnecting|Comments Off on The Maths of ‘good enough’ relationships